Everything happens for a reason. That reason might not always be clear instantly, but with time often comes the answer. For instance this blog; the W was waiting patiently for me to find my topic ánd the right song matching the topic. At waking up yesterday, the perfect song was playing in my head, leaving a big smile on my face; after last weeks retreat the words just came to mind, no thinking, fretting, wondering or brooding necessary! This example might seem to be a very, very simple thing and not comparible to a depression, desease, loss or other dismay, but it works the same though.

It’s all about wisdom and learning to recognize the wisdom within you. With your head you can acquire lots of knowledge, your brain helps you understand certain principles, but when it comes down to really knowing, the answers are found in your heart. The English speaking people already knew that when they designed their language; when you really have to be able to recall certain knowledge, to really know, they say that you learn something by heart. It makes me wonder why we then, the Dutch speaking people, say we learn something from the head…

In this day and age most of us haven’t learned that wisdom stems from the heart. We learn that science has all the answers and if something isn’t proven scientifically, it doesn’t exist. We’re also told that wisdom is something that comes with age. And however that may be true at some level – it takes a lot of us a few decades into life to uravel the mystery of their being – pure wisdom is what you are born with; it is the wisdom of the heart.

If you work with young children or have them in your family, you know that a four year old is already a very complete and wise human being. Children are able to express their feelings, their needs, their thoughts from an intuitive source. They just start singing the song that comes to mind, just like the boy in my Kindergarten group many years ago that sang to his class about his kitten and it’s adventures. Or like the girl that fell asleep in the doll’s area, tired as she was of all the new impressions, not for one bit ashamed or hesitant to just lay down.

Last week I’ve seen a lot of people finding and expressing their wisdom. They dared to let their guard down, to just express what they needed, to let other people comfort, caress and love them. To feel what was inside, holding them back for years, making them ill or lonely. Wisdom is not only for the old, grey man on the mountain. It takes some courage, but if you are able to open your heart, really open it and let love overflow and take hold of you, you’ll find all wisdom you need is inside you already.

Wisdom therefore to me isn’t about knowledge of some scientific invention, it is not about knowing many languages or reading many books (although I’ll never stop reading…;-)). It is not about needing to know your purpose. It is about knowing who you are and what you need. It is about feeling it. It is about learning to express your needs, being in touch with them and creating the safest space possible for you.

So instead of asking your partner, mother, friend, father, child or colleague to love you more, start with loving yourself just a little bit more each day. I’ll do the same; I’ll love me just a little bit more.


Schrijver, dromer, verbinder, redacteur

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